TMC In Conversation With: Millie Mackintosh On Becoming A Mum.

“I didn’t realise I could function on such little sleep!”

Sometimes, all you need is a friend to check in on you to see how you’re doing. So, seeing as we’re definitely pals. We called new Mum, Millie Mackintosh, to find out how she’s coping. Revealing everything from what it’s like to become a Mum in a pandemic, the pulls on her mental health, and the biggest shock motherhood has given her. We also picked her fashionable brain to find out how she’s kept stylish in lockdown and the coolest clothing brands she’s shopping for Sienna.”

In Conversation With Millie Mackintosh

Ok, so we know you’re a celeb, but you have ‘Mum moments’ too right?

“Every day! I recently had to cut Sienna out of a vest after a particularly bad nappy explosion. It went all over both of us!!! Luckily, I had a pack of WaterWipes nearby”.

What are 5 things every new Mum needs?
  1. A good support network.
  2. Naps in the day – when the baby naps.
  3. Not to have to think about cooking or cleaning up – it can wait!
  4. Lots of cups of tea.
  5. Constant snacks.
What’s your current wardrobe staple?
What’s your current wardrobe staple?

“I have been living in very comfortable loungewear. Most things I wear get sick on them at some point during the day, so I like anything that’s easy to wash”.

Millie loves chic comfort brand Rails.
How do you feel about your body post-birth?

“I have so much more respect for my body, especially after experiencing what it is capable of. It has changed, but I am learning to love the changes, and I feel stronger than I did pre-baby”.

Any off the radar baby style brands you like?

“A few of my favourites are Babidu, La Coqueta and Patachou and I like Zara kids too, but I know that’s not niche”

Your go-to snack to keep you going during the day

“A handful of fresh berries or a Marmite rice cake”.

The best lockdown delivery you’ve had

“Hugo surprised me with a takeaway from London restaurant Zuma. It was such a treat. I really miss going on dates, but we make an effort to have a special dinner once a week”.

What’s it been like becoming a Mum in a pandemic?

“It’s crazy, isn’t it? It’s a question I never thought I would be asked. I like to find the positives in every situation, and it has been a blessing in some ways. We have had so much uninterrupted time at home as a family, and I am very grateful that we have had Sienna to keep us busy and make us laugh. I really feel for all the parents having to home school their kids, especially those working from home… I can’t imagine how hard that is”.

How is your mental health?

“I definitely have days when I feel down about everything, and I find it hard to look on the bright side, but I remind myself that it’s normal to feel like that. I rely on a few things to boost my mood. Usually, I start by talking about it to a loved one, or I like to go for a run with a favourite feel-good playlist, cook some comfort food or have some me-time with a candlelit bath”.

The biggest surprise you had when becoming a Mum

“I didn’t realise I could function on such little sleep! Somehow you just keep going”.

Has becoming a Mum made your more eco-conscious?

“Yes, I am very conscious of trying to protect the world Sienna will grow up in, which is why I’m so thrilled that WaterWipes are now biodegradable. I love that they are still the same purity and quality as before, and just two ingredients, which is why they are my go-to. We also recycle all of Sienna’s clothes when she has grown out of them and borrowed what we can from friends rather than buying everything new”.

The 10 Questions you might have after having a baby

The three months after birth aren’t called the fourth trimester for nothing. Yes, you have your little baby, but you’re also extremely fragile, and it’s completely normal to feel a bit crap.

We put so much pressure on ourselves to know everything straight away, to bounce back to our former selves and pretend to the world that we’re handling everything like a bloody pro.

But guess what? You’ve just grown a tiny human inside of you, and now it’s out there in the world, while your body and mind are quite frankly in a state of shock.

No one, (not even your Mother-in-Law) expects you to know it all, or do it all.

So, stop being so hard on yourself and quit the compare game right now. Because everyone feels like this.

It’s your recovery, your body, your mind, your baby, and you’ll get to wherever you need to get to, in your own time!

We spoke to Clare Castell, founder of Blossom Antenatal, to answer the top ten questions that women ask after giving birth.

*Blossom Antenatal offer free breastfeeding classes, plus a variety of paid antenatal and postnatal classes to support new and expectant parents.

How do mothers feel after birth?

“Mothers can feel a range of emotions. Often, for women, the expectation is that you will fall instantly in love with your gorgeous newborn baby, but this isn’t always the case. Of course, some women will but don’t be too hard on yourself if you don’t immediately feel the rush of oxytocin (the love hormone). You might just feel tired and emotional, and this is ok. Depending on your birth experience, physical recovery varies from woman to woman. Allowing yourself time to rest and recover is essential”, says Clare.

Is it normal to cry after birth?

“As with any experience in life, birth is a very emotional experience. It is normal to cry, laugh and smile, and you should meet these range of emotions with an open heart”, says Clare. Baby blues are normal, it does not make you a bad Mum or suggest that you’re not coping. The days, and even weeks, after birth are emotional and it’s ok if you get upset over small things. Just roll with it and while you’re looking after your baby make sure you are looked after too. Clare adds, “If these feelings continue and you feel overwhelmed, then you can call your GP or midwife to let them know. Talk to those that care for you and support you and if you feel you need more support then reach out. PANDA is an organisation supporting women who suffer from postnatal depression, and they have a helpline you can call just to talk”. You may even find one call is all you need.

Can a woman go crazy?

“Most women feel tired, and the changing hormones can make them feel sad one minute and happy the next. This isn’t crazy!” Says Clare. She adds, “There are some mental health conditions like postpartum psychosis, which needs immediate medical attention, but thankfully, this is a rare occurrence. If you do have thoughts and feelings that are overwhelming, or you are acting out of character, then you must speak to your doctor, midwife or health professional as help is out there”.

What is postpartum psychosis?

“This is a serious mental health condition where you must seek help urgently”, says Clare. She adds “It can be an overwhelming and frightening experience. Symptoms include severe depression, rapid mood changes, confusion and feeling disorientated. You might also feel restless, unable to sleep or concentrate and experience delusions or hallucinations”.

Can my newborn feel my emotions?

They certainly can. Newborn babies can communicate and are primed to understand emotions. It is proven that kisses from a mother to her baby can stimulate responses in their brain, and when you are emotionally upset, they can feel it in their bodies too. “They definitely feel and respond to your cues as much as you do to theirs”, says Clare. Want to know more? Clare says, “There is lots of information on Baby Brain Development on the NPSCC website”.

When can you have sex after birth?

This is completely up to you and your partner. It is whenever you feel ready. Please don’t ever feel like you have to rush and do it in your own time. Not sure, but you think there’s a problem? Clare suggests, “Always speak with your GP if you have concerns about your physical recovery”.

Is it ok I don’t feel like having sex?

“This is very normal for women after birth. Hormone changes can impact your libido and how you feel, nevermind the fact you have a newborn baby to take care of. Talk to your partner, and if it starts to take a toll on your relationship, then speaking with organisations like Relate can help. But usually, patience and time can help, plus a supportive relationship and partner”, says Clare.”

How soon after birth can you get pregnant?

This can happen as soon as your body starts ovulating. Clare explains, “There are women that find themselves pregnant six weeks after their baby’s birth, so you must use contraception. Don’t forget you ovulate before your first period so you can get pregnant before this happens”.

Why does it smell down there after birth?

Your uterus sheds lochia after birth, and while this is mostly made up of blood, it is normal for it to have a slight odour. If you notice a strong smell, it is worth speaking to your GP to ensure you don’t have an infection.

What is the meaning of postpartum?

The period just after you’ve had your baby.

Along with Blossom Antenatal’s free breastfeeding classes, they also offer paid classes in hypnobirthing, baby massage, infant first aid and sleep. For more information on Blossom Antenatal and their classes head to https://www.blossomantenatal.com

Hey, It’s Ok… To Feel Low After Birth.

A spa break would be great, thanks!

The feeling you get when your new little fam returns home from hospital, is just the best. If we could bottle and sell those ‘oh-so grateful’ emotions, we’d be bloody loaded. But it’s also a bit like a giant wave has hit you. And with that, comes a rollercoaster ride of emotions that it is entirely normal to experience. While we can’t physically come round your house and hug you. We can give you a list of things that might boost your mood when you’re feeling a bit low. Print this it out and put it on your fridge, stat.

Hey, it’s ok… to feel a little low after birth

  1. You’re doing amazing
  2. You just grew a human
  3. What ever it is, it can wait.
  4. Housework is NOT essential
  5. A nap can fix everything
  6. Food deliveries are your saviour.
  7. Cry if you need to.
  8. Have a sugary cup of tea.
  9. Breathe in, count to four, and repeat four times.
  10. Tomorrow is a new day.
No one bounces back

Fed up with seeing influencers and celebs with their perfect snap-back bodies? Guess what? They’re lying! Not even the girl in the photo looks like the girl in the photo. So quit the comparison game now. It’s OK to feel a bit shit. We all do. But trust us, it won’t last forever. You’ll either work your way to whatever shape you want to get to, or you’ll suddenly realise that you just don’t care.

Expect to cry over the smallest things

Your midwife will warn you that you might have a day or two where you can’t stop crying. And boy-oh-boy will she be right. From losing the TV remote to This Morning’s call-in section, we had tears at every turn. “Just let it out”, says practising midwife and founder of The Pregnancy Wellness Podcast @midwife_pip, “Baby blues in the first week are entirely normal. Sleep deprivation, plus new challenges, changes, frustrations, and your physical recovery, can all cause women to feel teary”. Go easy on yourself, it’s a lot to deal with, and it’s normal to be up and down.

Feeling low doesn’t = postnatal depression

“Hormones! They have so much to answer for”, says @midwife_pip “Baby Blues are a common feeling in the first week after birth, your mood may dip, and things can feel a little overwhelming. Remember you have just undergone a huge physical and psychological change and are navigating a whole new journey”. If these emotions continue and you feel like you can’t cope, talk to those that care for you and if you need more support then reach out to your GP or midwife. PANDA is an organisation that helps women who suffer from postnatal depression and they have a helpline you can call just to talk. Give it a go. You may even find one call is all you need.

It’s OK to feel a bit broken

Labour is often compared to running a marathon, never mind the nine months of pregnancy you’ve just endured. You deserve all the rest you can get! “Remember your mind and body have adapted to create, grow and birth your baby”, says @midwife_pip. She adds, “It needs time to recover – it does not happen overnight. Nurturing yourself and allowing yourself time for self-care, be it a walk, a bath or a phone call with a friend, isn’t self-indulgent. It is a necessity! Don’t allow any Mum guilt to tell you otherwise”.

10 Baby Sleep Myths That Really Need To Do One

Sleep is the new weather: it’s all we talk about and for good reason, because the second you become a parent it pretty much the sole topic of conversation – certainly in the TMC households.

Here, we break down ten of the biggest baby sleep myths. You’ll find it’s the perfect read at 2am with one eye open…

Make sure you get some sleep now, because you won’t be sleeping when the baby arrives!

Let’s squash this one right now. Show us the sleep bank account and we’ll happily start saving. Until then this makes no sense. Squirrel away a solid eight hours now, to draw out at four in the morning in eight-weeks time? Unlikely.

All Babies Sleep Through From 12 Weeks

Do they though? Is that why we’re still dealing with toddlers who wake up 15 times a night because they’re too hot/too cold/scared of the wardrobe monster? We’d love to know…

Bottle Fed Babies Always Sleep Through

We’ve done both, and we have to say we beg to differ. Bottle fed, breast fed… the only difference is whether you whack a bap or trek downstairs to the Perfect Prep Machine. Pro Tip: Get an ‘upstairs’ Perfect Prep. Or move to a bungalow.

You Should Sleep When The Baby Sleeps

We’d love to. Except for the first two months there’s every Tom, Dick and Harry in the living room eating our M&S biscuits, and when they leave there’s the small matter of cleaning the house, washing seven million piles of laundry, possibly eating something or even showering at some point. Plus, have you ever tried to nap on demand? Knowing you’ve got a maximum of 20 minutes before the kid wakes up creates far from favourable circumstances for some shut eye. We’ve never been more awake.

You Should Let Daddy Sleep On Weekdays

Let’s get this straight. We grow the kid, ruining genitalia and bikini body in the process, and when it arrives, he sleep through for five nights a week? Not on our watch.

If You Keep Them Awake All Day They’ll Sleep At Night

You’d think so, wouldn’t you. But no, this is babies we’re talking about, and they defy all laws of logic. From the hours of 6am-6pm they’ll drop off faster than a narcoleptic but when the sun goes down they are Good. To. Go. Where’s the party at, mum?

If You Put Them To Bed Later, They’ll Sleep Longer In The Morning

Again, this makes no sense. If we stayed up drinking until 3am you’d do well to see us surface before noon, but a baby will still wake up at 5.30am like clockwork. Our advice? Put them down before 7pm and then at least you’ll watch Love Island in peace.

Give Them A Dummy, Then They’ll Definitely Sleep

This one works for a while but don’t be fooled. The second that little sucker falls out the baby’s mouth they’ll be screaming to high heaven and you’re crawling around half-naked on your hands and knees in the pitch black, frantically searching for the ‘do-do’. Pro Tip: MAM do dummies that glow in the dark. You’re welcome.

The Crying-Out Method Is Bad For Your Baby

You know what’s really bad for baby? Being left in the charge of an adult so tired they feel like they’ve just downed ten sambucas and are being driven clinically insane by sleep deprivation. Let them cry it out. Don’t let them cry it out. Just do whatever it takes to survive.

The Nights Are Long, But The Years Are Short’

Like most irritating sentimental parenting clichés, this one is annoying spot on. Soak it in sis.

Exercising In Pregnancy – Our Shoulds And Should Nots

First pregnancy? Or maybe you’re tackling it with a toddler in tow? Either way, working out can feel a little scary.

You’re probably asking all kinds of questions. Like if it’s ok to run, spin and jump? Or if specific exercises can hurt your baby?

It’s completely normal to feel nervous about exercising when you have a baby growing in your belly. Lots of women find out they’re pregnant and immediately want to huddle in. And that’s a good thing! The most important thing expectant Mums can do, is to listen to their body.

However, while rest is important, you shouldn’t just sit on the sofa and eat cake for nine months.

Here is why..

The benefits of exercising in pregnancy

Keeping active gives you an easier ride throughout pregnancy, during birth, and helps with post-natal recovery.

It is also known to:
• Reduce back pain
• Boost your energy levels and mood
• Help you sleep better
• Aid digestion and relieve bloating
• Improve balance and posture
• Help prevent gestational diabetes

How much exercise should I be doing?

If you have a low-risk pregnancy, you should aim for at least 150 minutes of moderate-intensity physical activity a week. ”Try breaking it up into 30-minute sessions over 5 days”, suggests Pelvic Health Physio Therapist Emma Brockwell. She adds, “Remember physical activity can include housework, going for walks, gardening etc.… Moderate-intensity activity involves anything that makes you breathe faster, while you’re still able to hold a conversation. If you want to carry out high-impact exercise, then consider your current fitness ability and the level of risk of your pregnancy. If you’re at low-risk and you’ve never run before, you could start a programme like the NHS ‘Couch to 5k’. If you notice any leakage or pains, then stop and rest and then switch to something that’s lower impact”. Take it easy and listen to your body for what is suitable for you. Want more tips on the types of exercise you can do? Emma’s book ‘Why Did No One Tell Me?” has tons of advice on supporting your body in pregnancy, birth and beyond.

I haven’t exercised in ages. Am I ok to start?

The first trimester can knock you for six, and for many, it’s the most challenging part of pregnancy. It’s common to find yourself four or five months in, with a newly rounded bump and feel completely out of practice. Feeling scared to get started? Personal Trainer James Duigan says there’s no need, “the second trimester is the best time to include some safe exercise in your weekly routine”.

Follow your own footsteps

Go at your own pace. Enjoy being pregnant and find what works for you. If running and cycling now feel ambitious, try swapping them for brisk walks, swimming, or low-intensity workouts. Focus on strengthening techniques, like squats and lunges. Choose exercises that help support your body, try pregnancy yoga, or join a prenatal pilates class. Not only will prenatal classes strengthen your body, but exercising with other mums-to-be will fill you with confidence and make you realise that you’re not the only one feeling a certain way.

But I’m really nervous about exercising

There could be lots of reasons as to why you might be feeling like this. Maybe you’ve experienced miscarriage, or your last baby was delivered via an emergency method. Or, quite understandably, you’re just a bit scared of the unknown. It’s ok to feel like this, and booking in to see a pelvic health physiotherapist could give you the green light you need and a worthy appointment for any mum-to-be. The therapist will be able to assess your fitness levels, discuss what’s achievable, and then steer you on the right path for strengthening up that bod.

What exercises shouldn’t I do during pregnancy?

“It depends on your story”, says Emma Brockwell. She adds, “If you want to carry on with certain sports, then you must speak to your GP. It’s important not to bump the bump. So, avoid sports with a high risk of falling. Also, no weighted sit-ups and abdominal rotation machines after 12-weeks. No hot yoga and sports in extreme heat. I’d also strongly suggest avoiding contact sports such as football or kickboxing”.

Don’t ignore your core

Paying attention to your core is paramount. “It is crucial to pretty much everything you do”, says Emma Brockwell. She adds, “If it’s working well, then it will offer your spine and pelvis stability and reduce your chance of injury. It allows you to move more effectively, stops you from leaking urine, poo and wind and allows you to breathe optimally”.

Do you know where your core is?

For many women pregnancy and birth are the first time we really connect with our bodies. And as you start to practice your pelvic floor exercises, you may experience a light-bulb moment when it comes to locating your core. “Contrary to popular belief, your core is not your six-pack muscles”, says Emma Brockwell.

2 easy steps to finding your core

Once you’ve found it, exercising makes so much more sense.
1. Inhale through your nose and let the air rise into your lower ribs and tummy.
2. Exhale through the mouth, squeeze up from your anus in a sweeping motion towards your pelvis, up to your lower abdomen and then gently draw in your stomach as if you’re gently hugging your baby.

Emma Brockwell adds, “Your belly button should not move up, just in a little, and you shouldn’t see any gripping around your lower ribs”.

What core exercises are safe?

This differs from person to person. Generally, crunches and sit-ups should be avoided after 12 weeks. Some women can tolerate planks throughout their whole pregnancy. However, lots of people like to avoid them. Exercises like squats and lunges are deemed to be the safest form. But if you want to be sure, then it’s best to check in with a prenatal fitness expert or physio to receive a personalised recommendation. James Duigan also offers a very comprehensive guide in his book Clean & Lean Pregnancy Guide.

Things To Know About Having A Toddler

You Now Share Everything

Everything. Including the meal that is identical to theirs, sat directly next to theirs..but on your plate.

Sometimes Their Voice Grates On Your Soul

Of course there is also no sweeter sound. But have you ever been asked to go swimming 450, 000 in the space of 3 hours? Top tip; do not mention ANY activity until 15 minutes before said activity. Trust us.

Letting Them Into The Bathroom With You Does Nothing For Self Esteem

‘Mummy you’ve got long hair on your bottom like your head’ To clear things up she calls her V her bottom and I’m mid wax. But thanks babes one day you’ll learn the up keep is hard work, expensive and no one really cares if there is hair there or not.

And Can Cause Havoc

‘Daddy can I hold your willy whilst you wee’ Oh god.

They Will Repeat Everything

Don’t slag off anyone (especially a family member) near them. You now can’t have a conversation without it being parroted back at the worst time. Be careful who you bitch about when they are around. They will tell them.

When They Go Quiet, Worry!

Yes like the movies it does mean they’ve drawn over your pouf with your favourite Tom Ford lippy.

They Wake Up Really Fucking Early

No matter what you try.

They Don’t Care What Company You Are In

You could be sat with the Queen and they’d declare that they just did a ‘Donald Trump’ Thanks dad…!!! Farts, Tantrums, whines, giggles and inappropriate conversation will happen no matter the company.

Their Innocence Is The Best Thing Ever

They will say the best things at the hardest of times. It will bring a smile to everyones face. Keep them little for as long as you can.

You Will Complete The Day By 9AM

Play doh, Drawing, dress up, Toy playing, 400 snacks, that craft set you thought would last the day, every episode of Peppa sodding pig. All by the time it gets light outside.

Magazines Will Bankrupt You

And they are full of crap. Sure they might take the edge off for 5 minutes but trust us they are £7 and NOT worth it. Save that yearly spend and buy something decent.. like a Chanel