SOS: Save Our Sleep

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 29 April 2021

SOS: Save Our Sleep

Sleep. No-one can prepare new parents for the lack of, and with so much conflicting advice out there it can be hard to feel compelled to adopt a certain routine or schedule.

Rosey Davidson is the founder of Just Chill Baby Sleep, an infant sleep consultancy focused on providing straight forward, no-nonsense sleep advice to parents. As the ultimate sleep guru (ask anyone who has ever worked with Rosey), we asked her for some advice on her most commonly asked questions.

Setting up a great sleep environment is important, but how do you go about this and why is it so crucial?

Our sleep environment is the set-up of where we sleep. We can all benefit from optimising this – babies and adults alike. First of all, it’s important to think about temperature. We all sleep a little better when things are on the cooler side. The Lullaby Trust, the baby sleep charity, say that the safest temperature for our little ones is 16-20 degrees Celsius. If you can’t control the temperature of the room, you should adapt the layers that baby is wearing. In really hot temperatures its fine for baby to just wear a vest or a nappy to bed. If you are unsure how warm your baby is its best to feel the back of their neck or their chest. It’s very normal for their hands and feet to feel a little cooler than the rest of them. We do have a guide for what to dress baby in for bed on the blog on our website.
Make sure your sleep environment is as tech free as possible (no TVs etc!). The blue and white light from devices, and bright lights, can interfere with our sleep hormone melatonin. When doing nappy changes or night feeds I suggest an amber reading light, or a low lamp to avoid waking up you and your baby fully at this time. Amber, red or pink are the best colours to help us sleep.
The next really helpful pointer for sleep environment is to black out those bedrooms! Darkness helps us sleep and helps facilitate the production of melatonin, our sleep hormone. Often, we are putting our babies to bed when it’s still light outside, and it gets lighter in the morning way earlier than we would like them to get up! Keeping things dark can really help them to switch off, and to stay asleep a little longer.

Do you need a routine? And when and how do you go about starting one?

There really isn’t a right or wrong answer to this. It’s a really personal thing as to when you might want to start having a bit of a rhythm to your day. I do believe that all humans do like to have a routine of sorts. Most babies seem to naturally fall into their own routine by around 6 months, but if they haven’t done this then you can absolute start implementing one. Many will benefit from a gentle rhythm to their day even earlier. A really great way to start is to simply aim to start the day at roughly the same time each day. This can help anchor your day, so that baby’s naps will hopefully start to follow a bit of a pattern. I think it’s really important to be able to go out and socialise a little, especially with things starting to open up a little more, but also to give baby the opportunity to sleep if they are tired. A routine shouldn’t be so rigid that you can’t get out once in a while.

How do you help your baby settle themselves, if that’s the route you want to take? Is it important for them to settle themselves?

It’s important to note that there is nothing wrong with helping your little one to sleep. This is perfectly normal, and in many cases not an issue at all. Some babies are fed or rocked to sleep and get a settled night, or you might find your situation quite manageable as it is. However, if you are in a situation that feels unsustainable and you would like to work on sleep, it is worth assessing how your little one falls asleep. For some babies how they fall asleep at night is how is what they come to expect between each sleep cycle when they stir (i.e., rocking, feeding, patting etc). If you want to work on them connecting sleep cycles independently then practising putting baby down awake is a good place to begin. You can do this really slowly by layering in new ‘habits’ before removing the old, or you can start a bit quicker if you feel it would be beneficial for your family. It is important to note the temperament of your baby. Some need more gradual change, and some are fairly relaxed and may adapt really well. Find a method and plan that suits you, your baby and your belief system.

How can we go about managing sleep regressions?

As babies and toddlers move through developmental milestones it isn’t unusual for sleep to be temporarily disrupted. They may wake more frequently at night, take shorter naps or fight falling sleep. These periods of disruption are often referred to as ‘sleep regressions’ even though they are triggered by phases of developmental progression. Whilst most babies tend to reach key milestones at roughly the same age as each other, all babies are different and will experience these phases of development when they are ready. The only real ‘regression’ that we recognise is the ‘4-month sleep regression.’ It isn’t really a regression at all, it’s actually a progression in your baby’s development. It is a good sign that your baby’s sleep cycle is maturing.
This phase of change represents the biggest change in sleep that your baby will go through, making the structure of their sleep cycles much more like those of an adult. Once this change in sleep has occurred, we all, babies and adults alike, naturally wake between each of these cycles. It can be a good time to work on sleep if you want to.
You can help your baby to get their sleep back on track and support them to practice how they can fall asleep themselves. Learning to sleep independently can be tricky for some babies, but it is absolutely achievable over time. Some babies will naturally adjust to their newly matured sleep patterns and sleep well again within a few weeks, others need some help to practice new skills in order to sleep well.

For sleep, I’m sure a lot of us know there isn’t a one size fits all, what’s the best advice you’d give for getting support?

Do some reading and research. We have some great free resources available. Remember that there is no right or wrong when it comes to sleep. We are all individuals, and you are your baby’s expert. My YouTube channel and our blog are a great place to start. I also have lots of guest lives and podcasts in my highlights on Instagram. You might find that with a few tweaks you are able to make some really great progress. If you do want some more tailored help, we offer 1:1 telephone calls and online courses. When looking for a sleep consultant it’s important that you take into account your parenting style and beliefs and choose someone who fits with that.
Ultimately, you will sleep again, and you don’t have to suffer sleep deprivation long term. We all deserve a good night’s sleep!
You can find out more about Just Chill Baby Sleep here: www.justchillbabysleep.co.uk

Tags 10minuteread, Bedtimebrowse

8 Weird Things No One Told You About Newborns

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 29 April 2021

8 Weird Things No One Told You About Newborns

Here at TMC we pride ourselves on telling the truth. The whole truth, even when it’s ugly, strange or downright disgusting. Because let’s face it, pregnancy and birth are pretty peculiar things, and it doesn’t stop there. Want to know what the books won’t tell you about newborns? Forewarned is forearmed…

Attachment Issues Start Early (Literally)

Remember the 90s, when your home phone had a curly cord that prevented you from wandering further than a 5ft radius from its base? Well, that, only the base is the placenta (still firmly wedged inside you) and the cord is attached to the screaming new human you’ve just pushed out.
Sometimes, the cord is slightly too short, meaning when you try to pull the babe up to your chest, they spring back as if they’re attached to a bungee cord. So, you just have to… sit there. Legs akimbo, waiting for the cord to stop pulsing so your totally grossed out partner can cut it with a pair of children’s craft scissors (spoiler: it’s harder than he thinks).

They Come Out Covered in Crap (Again, Literally)

the kid emerges bone dry (and about 12 weeks old). The truth is, they’re covered in all kinds: blood, poo (theirs, not yours), and vernix; the white sticky substance that covers their skin while in the womb. Your first inclination (naturally) would be to give them a good scrub before dressing them in your White Company onesie of choice; but you’ll be told to wait a week first, giving the vernix time to soak in naturally.
It’s the equivalent of having a facial on an expensive spa day, then being told you have to wait for three hours before going in the sauna afterwards. You’ll want to do the right thing, but you’ll more than likely end up giving in after three days and whacking them in the bath.

The Umbilical Cord Looks Like a Witchetty Grub

The first time you change the kid’s nappy, it might surprise you to discover two inches of umbilical cord where a neat little belly button should be, clamped with what looks like a sandwich bag clip from Lakeland. Three days in, it’ll smell like… well, exactly what it is, which is dead flesh (TMI?). You’re still not allowed to wash the baby, and spend every nappy change terrified that you’ll knock it off and curse them with an outie for the rest of their life. It will fall off, eventually. Some people even keep them, but those people are weird and we’re not sure we want to be friends with them.

Their Head Has a Pulse

Ever wondered why people are obsessed with protecting the baby’s head? Well, it might be because there’s a large gaping hole there, where their skull hasn’t fused together yet (aka the fontanel) meaning that their brain is essentially exposed. Terrified yet? Yep, us too.

Baby Girls Have Periods

Around day three, you might notice drops of blood in your baby girl’s nappy. This will scare the shit out of you but try not to panic; a spike in maternal estrogen levels can simulate a female foetus’s uterus, producing a mini-period within the first week of their life. Not weird AT ALL.

The First Poo is Like Thick Black Tar

It’s a pretty well-known fact that babies poo a lot, but what you might not know is that the very first one comes out like treacle. And not in a good way. You could genuinely lay tarmac with this stuff; it’s dark, sticky and will take out an entire pack of Water Wipes in one go.

Acne Doesn’t Wait For Puberty

We’ve all woken up with a giant spot on our forehead and new-borns are no different: baby acne is a thing. Apparently, the magical properties of breastmilk clear it right up, so resist the urge to squeeze and slather on some of that liquid gold instead.

Sometimes They’re Hairy

If your kid decides to make an early appearance, don’t be surprised if they come out with more back hair than your dad. Officially known as lanugo, this is the first hair your baby’s body makes, and plays a vital role in protecting skin and regulating body temperature in the womb. Don’t crack out the Veet so soon (kidding), it will fall out naturally after a few weeks.
We know we shouldn’t have to say this, but don’t shave your baby (something our midwife once said to us, which made us think only one thing: someone once did).

Tags 5minuteread, Yournaptimeknowhow

10 Parenting Moments That Leave Us Seething With Rage

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 23 April 2021

10 Parenting Moments That Leave Us Seething With Rage

We used to think we were pretty chill; then we had a baby. The Mum rage is real people, and we can’t blame it all on postpartum hormones…

When Someone Parks in Parent & Child Who Isn’t a Parent and Does Not Have a Child

We endured 9 months of pregnancy and ripped our lady bits in two to earn this parenting perk; and we’ll be damned if a spotty teenager in a sodding Vauxhall Corsa gets to enjoy those 2 extra feet of door-opening space.

When Another Kid Hits Your Kid

Your voice might be saying: ‘Oh don’t worry, they all do it, he gives as good as he gets!’ but your brain is thinking ‘you stay away from my baby you little shit’.

When Your Toddler Waves At Someone And They Don’t Wave Back

Who hurt you?! How could you resist the greeting of my adorable baby’s chubby little hand?!

When People Get Your Baby’s Gender Wrong

A pink dress and a giant bow isn’t enough of a clue for you people?! How about the blanket with her name on it or the sippy cup that says ‘Mummy’s Little Princess?’ NO? REALLY?!

When Your Baby Hurts You

For someone who can barely hold a spoon, toddlers can’t half pack a powerful punch. When they’re not cutting their teeth on your nipples they’re ripping chunks out of your already-balding-postpartum-head.

When Your Mother in Law Favours The Other Grandchildren

We know it’s probably us being totally irrational, entirely unreasonable etc etc, but is it too much to ask that everyone in the whole world thinks our child is the most special human being on the entire planet?

When Strangers Touch Your Newborn

Even pre-Covid this was 10/10 not okay Hun. We have no idea who you are, or where your probably filthy germ-infested hands have been, but back the hell off and STEP AWAY FROM THE BABY.

When Older Kids Won’t Give Your Kid a Turn

Ever stared out a 10-year-old because they wouldn’t get their skinny little bottom off the baby swing? We have, and we have absolutely zero shame.

When Someone Judges You For Feeding Your Baby

Oh hey there! These are breasts! 50% of the population have them! We haven’t whacked them out for shits and giggles, we actually require them to keep our tiny human alive. Move along people.

When Someone Comments On Your Baby Body

‘You’re so big! When are you due?’
The kids in pre-school Karen, go mind your goddamn business.

Tags 3minuteread, coffeebreakcatchup

You Can Now Have Breast Milk Delivered To Your Door.

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 21 April 2021

You Can Now Have Breast Milk Delivered To Your Door.

Yep, you read that correctly. Breast milk is now available on tap.

Ok, maybe it’s not that readily available.

But a new delivery service means there’s another option (other than formula) for parents who are unable to breastfeed.

Now, we completely understand how the concept might throw you off a little.

Tbh we had a lot of questions too.

So that’s why we caught up with Best Milk’s founder Dr Julia Sarno to find out what it’s all about, if it’s safe and why you might want to use it.

Why did you create Best Milk?

“I created the company because I experienced issues with breastfeeding, and I wasn’t able to access the NHS supply because my baby wasn’t sick or premature. After searching for a service like this, I realised there was nothing out there for me. By creating Best Milk, I hoped to provide a solution for other parents that experienced the same issue as me”.

Who would use it?

“A lot of parents can’t breastfeed, but they want to offer their children the benefits of natural milk. This might be because they have used a surrogate or they’ve adopted. There can be many reasons why someone might want to use the service. It could be that a mother needs to go in for an operation and wants their baby to have breastmilk while they can’t provide it”.

Where does the milk come from?

“We are a milk bank that collects and screens excess breast milk, which comes from wet nurses and we conduct direct screening of all the women that donate”.

How do I know it’s safe?

The screening process of our sharing mothers is rigorous, and every donation is thoroughly checked. We work with two top UK accredited (UKAS) laboratories, and we follow and support both our sharing mothers and the recipient families. We don’t accept donations from mums on antibiotics, antidepressants, painkillers, have mastitis or are Covid-positive. Every donating mother has successfully passed a serological screening, which tests for HIV-I & II, Hepatitis B (HBV), Hepatitis C (HBC), Syphilis and HTLV (human T-lymphotropic virus).

What happens to the milk after it’s donated?

“We test every donation, and if it passes the screening process, then it is professionally pasteurised to ensure any traces of bacteria or viruses are destroyed. All of its vital nutritional and immunological properties are maintained during the practice. The milk is then stored at the correct temperature, ready to be sent out for delivery”.

How much does it cost?

“Each case is individual. Some mothers can breastfeed, but aren’t providing enough milk for their babies, so they just need a top-up. It completely depends on the individual, and that’s a conversation that we will have with each parent. Our most popular 5000ml package consists of 25 bottles of pure breast milk and costs £500. This will feed a newborn for up to a month”.

How is it delivered?

“It’s sent out via a courier in a chilled container to make sure it stays fresh and at the correct temperature. Then dependant on the milk you’ve purchased you store it either in the freezer or fridge until you need to warm it up ready for your baby to drink”.

Is it available nationwide?

“Yes, we now use a very specialised courier that can deliver anywhere in the UK”.

Is this the only service in the UK?

“Currently, yes. It’s available in other countries, but other than the NHS, we are currently the only independent milk bank in the UK”.

Tags 5minuteread, Yournaptimeknowhow

TMC Talks To Alison McAleavy Founder Of Zig & Star

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 21 April 2021

TMC Talks To Alison McAleavy Founder Of Zig & Star

Let’s face it being a mum is a big enough job on its own. It’s a full time commitment with no pay and mad hours! So adding ANOTHER full time job to the mix is not only very impressive but also massively inspiring. We recently spoke to ex- Topshop fashion buyer Alison McAleavy about the launch of her new unisex kids footwear brand, Zig & Star to find out how she manages it all..

Explain what you do in a sentence?

After a 20 year career in fashion, I have just launched my own brand, Zig+Star unisex kids footwear, created to challenge outdated gender stereotypes and uniquely designed to last longer.

How long have you done your job?

I left my job as Head of Buying at Topshop over 2 years ago to focus on the brand full time, and it’s taken that long to perfect the designs. I worked in conjunction with a paediatric podiatrist as I wanted the styles to not only look good, but to be good for their feet too. Before launching the brand, I worked in fashion for over 20 years, specialising in footwear and accessories.

What’s the coolest thing about it?

My whole career, I had always worked for someone else… I had a lot of responsibility but none of the risk was mine. It’s been a big leap to start my own business (especially in the middle of a pandemic!) but it has been amazing. You definitely have highs and lows but the feeling you get when you achieve something like finalising the range, building a website, and getting great customer feedback… you can’t beat that feeling.

What does your day or week entail?

My working week was all over the place during homeschooling, but now my 3 kids are back in school, I’m starting to settle into a bit of a routine. I drop the kids to school, go up to my office at home and log in to check all emails, new orders and general queries. I am loving communicating with customers, giving advice on sizing and generally finding out what they like and don’t like. I think it’s really important to be as close to the customers as possible… social media is a great resource for this, the feedback is instant, and it’s a two-way conversation.

Where did you start out?

I didn’t study fashion, I actually studied English Literature at university. But I got a job at Faith Shoes back in the day when it had concessions in Topshop and was THE place to get your shoes (really showing my age!) I was hooked instantly… as a buyer you had to find the balance of creativity and commerciality and I loved it. Plus you got to travel all over the world, which in your mid-20’s was amazing. From there I moved several times, but finally spent the last 8 years of my career as Head of Buying at Topshop.

What has been your biggest challenge?

As a boot-strapped start up, it’s just me doing everything so I’ve had to become a jack of all trades. Product development is my comfort zone but I’ve had to learn about digital marketing, web design, SEO, even graphic design… all sorts of things I had no idea about before I started. I’ve got a very supportive husband who has helped with things like logistics (and spreadsheets!) but generally it feels like I learn something new every day.

What piece of advice would you give to someone hoping to do the same?

My advice on starting your own business would be, find something you’re passionate about, and that gives you purpose. The highs you experience are great, but to survive the lows, you’ve got to be absolutely committed to your idea.. anything less won’t survive. My mission was to give kids the freedom to be themselves, and not be restricted by the outdated sterotypes that dominate the kidswear market – boys should be strong and tough, and girls should be kind and pretty. The choices we make for our kids clothes and shoes can either accept or reject those stereotypes… As a mum of 2 girls and a boy, I started Zig+Star to champion equality and freedom for all kids.

Something you’ve learnt that is crucial to either your job or to success:

Collaboration and support.. for me, I feel like Zig+Star has been a group effort and wouldn’t have been possible without people being generous with their time and expertise. I have a lot of friends from the industry who have supported me, people I’ve met along the way who given up their time to advise and help me, and then friends and family who have listened, counselled and motivated me when I’ve needed it most. I can honestly say it wouldnt have been possible without the great people around me.

How important is it to switch off?

I would say it’s taken me quite a long time to realise the importance of switching off. When you work for a fast-paced business, it’s harder to set your own schedule. Since working for myself, I found the value in taking time away from work, especially when things feel stressful. My lockdown pleasure has been walking every day, if i don’t get outside, even if just for 15 minutes, I feel like it definitely has an impact on my focus and productivity. If I can’t get outside, I will take half an hour away from a screen, and I really love listening to podcasts.

How do you manage your work / life balance?

In the beginning of starting the brand, I would say it was a struggle. I would be getting up early before the kids wake up and do a couple of hours of work before homeschooling started, and then back at it again in the evenings once my husband finished work . But now we’ve launched, and kids are back in school, it’s been much easier. Although I’m still busy, being in charge of my own schedule has made a big difference and I’ve found ways of working flexibly which mean I get to spend more time with my family. Also, the business is very much a family affair, and as I work from home, my two older daughters have loved getting involved and helping where they can.

How do manage mum guilt?

I have a very supportive husband, and we see parenting as a partnership. Somehow we have managed to muddle through with managing his busy full-time job, kids in and out of school, and starting the business. It’s not easy and I often feel like I’m not doing either job of mum or founder particularly well, but we also need to remember to cut ourselves some slack sometimes… I think parents need to give themselves a massive pat on the back for what they have managed over the last year.

How To Conquer The Fussy Eaters

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 17 April 2021

How To Conquer The Fussy Eaters

I know, it baffles me too when you give your child a meal which you may (or may not!) have been slaving over the hot stove for what feels like hours, just for them to turn their nose up. You try it, you whack it up on your Instagram stories to show off to all your mum friends, and you’re half tempted to give Jamie Oliver a buzz to get his verdict on it because you think it’s that damn good. And quite frankly, you’d give anything to have someone cook something delicious for you…so why don’t they want it!?

It’s totally A-Okay to not like everything, but it’s always good to try. How many times have you tried something you don’t like? If you don’t try, you don’t know! So, here are my top tips to conquer those fussy eaters…

Get involved!

Let your child have some sort of choice over their meals. When it comes to doing the food shop, allow them to pick some new fruit and veg to try…how exciting!! I love taking children to the supermarket, walking up and down the aisles, seeing what they want to try. It’s also great for their own knowledge. I aim for 1 new food or flavour a week. Realistically sometimes this doesn’t always happen. If they’re sick, tired, all of the above, it’s not worth giving them something you ultimately know they won’t enjoy. Sometimes their favourite home comfort food is what they fancy. Pick your time and your place. If you’re more of a home delivery kind of family, then hop online and have a browse with your little one. Let them do the clicking, it’ll make them have the feeling that they ‘did’ it.

Allow them to have a flick through some recipe books, grown up or children’s ones! See what they think looks good. Go out and buy the ingredients together so they can see what’s going into their meals.

Wean in 15

Joe Wicks

£9

Family Cookbook

Ella’s Kitchen

£10.99

Weaning book

Annabel Karmel

£8.52

Ready Steady Cook

Chop together. Mix together. Cook together. Bake together. And make it fun! I love these fab child friendly knifes from Kiddi Kutter. They’re a great way of letting your child have some more independence and involvement. Also, great for them to see what is actually going into their meals. As always, please do supervise just in case they have other ideas…! You don’t want to be off to A&E purely because you were trying to get your child to eat a carrot.

Kids Kitchen Knife Set

Onupgo

£8.99

Apron set

Hoolaroo

£14.95

Mini Baking Set

LakeLand

£11.99

Make them feel like a proper little chef in that kitchen and buy a cute apron and mini baking tool set. This will also (hopefully…!) save you some laundry. The more ‘involved’ they feel, the better.

Role Play

This is great for everyone, but especially little ones. Using some plastic, wooden, or even real fruit and veg, pretend to make up some recipes and serve to each other. Just make sure you go OTT with the whole “oh it’s delicious, SOOOO yummy in my tummy” thing when they serve you up some plastic bread with a felt cheese slice! Let them use your utensils, sauce pans etc. This is very exciting for them, especially as these are the ones you use, they’ll be feeling like a boss.

Duktig Play Kitchen

Ikea

£60

Fridge Play Food

Stoy

£25

https://www.alexandalexa.com/en/product/194132/le-toy-van-toy-toaster-set

Le Toy Van

£29.90

We Are family

I appreciate this isn’t always possible with work and other commitments, but try make an effort by doing this a few times a week if you can. Sit down and have a family meal. Talk to your little ones, engaging them in a grown-up conversation. Imagine if you had to sit there all by yourself and eat whilst someone meticulously watches you. Terrifying. I don’t think I’d eat either!

Children learn from example, so by them watching you eat your supper, will encourage them to eat theirs! I find it best to serve a big dish, such as lasagne, curry etc, and serve it up on the table in front of them, and make sure you’re all eating the same thing, you don’t want them getting FOMO, resulting in you having the left overs of whatever they don’t eat!

Stealth Is Wealth

Don’t get me wrong, I am all for children seeing what they are eating. Don’t hide that tomato under the ham, trust me, they’ll find it. However…if you’re making a tomato pasta sauce or bolognaise for example, there is no harm in grating or chopping those veggies till they’re small enough to go through a pin head and adding it into the mix. Those hidden veg are full of all the nutritional goodness your little one needs.

Crockery

Because one more piece of plastic fantastic garish crockery won’t hurt, will it?! Let your little ones choose a fun plate or bowl to eat from. I love the ones with a fun picture at the bottom, they’re great for encouraging them to eat the whole plate to reveal the picture.

White Melamine Eat & Learn Giftbox

Design Letters

£28

Dinner Winner Plate

Fred & Friends

£12.50

Mice Silicone Tableware

Zara

From £4.99

Keep Trying

They say it takes a child 10 goes at trying something before their taste buds decide whether it’s good or not. Just because your child licked the broccoli once and they instantly decided they didn’t like it, doesn’t mean it should never ever ever be served on their plate, ever again! Give it a few goes. I always go by the saying “smell it, lick it, chew it, swallow it.” It works…most of the time!

You don’t need to panic if your child who was once beautifully weaned and ate everything and anything, now only eats a handful of (possibly beige) meals. Children’s taste buds are constantly developing. This is also their way of taking some control. As long as your child is eating enough of a well-balanced diet, they’ll be okay. If you can, avoid caving and giving them another option or a slice of toast. If you do this once, you’ll be doing it every meal time.

Co-Sleeping: Expectation Vs Reality

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 17 April 2021

Co-Sleeping: Expectation Vs Reality

Just like stalking your other-half’s ex on Insta and picking your nose, we’ve all fallen asleep with a babe in the bed, whether that’s once in a blue moon or every night for six years. We’re all just doing what we can to survive – and don’t worry, everyone knows it.

Tags 5minuteread, Yournaptimeknowhow

Priceless Gifts For A New Mum

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 17 April 2021

Priceless Gifts For A New Mum

1. Not Telling Them Your Traumatic Birth Story Before They Give Birth

You might mean well, but a minute-by-minute graphic retelling of your 72-hour labour resulting in an emergency C-section and near-death isn’t as helpful as you think.

2. Keeping Unsolicited Advice to Yourself

Yes, we know they’ve lost a sock. No, they’re not hungry. We’re sure that is how they did it ‘in your day’, and we really couldn’t give a flying fuck that you disagree with co-sleeping.
Oh, and it’s a boy, actually.

3. Support Their Feeding Choices

Breastfeeding, pumping, formula; all kids live on a diet of toast and chicken nuggets in the end, so does it really matter?

4. Not Dropping Round Unannounced

Always ask in advance and make sure you don’t stay too long. If the baby is asleep, you’re encroaching on prime parent nap time – please leave through any exit.

5. Bring food

If you’re thinking about buying a teddy or a plant, STOP! Choose a pre-made lasagne instead.
Extra points if you wash your cup up and fold some washing before you leave.

6. Be Understanding When She Doesn’t Text Back

She still loves you, but her mind is busy remembering which boob she fed off last so she doesn’t get Mastitis. She’s living with a tiny human who hates sleep. The fog will lift eventually; until then, bear with her.

7. Share Your Reality

Endless night feeds scrolling through picture-perfect Insta feeds might make it look like every other mother has her shit together.
If you’re already a mum, acknowledge that it was really f*cking hard for you too. It will make her feel like she’s not alone.

8. Listen When They Want to Talk About The Baby

Hey, baby-free friends! We know you don’t really care about sleep training or teething or whether the kid has crapped for 4 days or not. Thank you for pretending to be interested.

9. Tell Her She’s Doing A Good Job

There is no appraisal from a newborn. The screaming in your face, vomming etc… can make you feel like a complete and utter failure. So a little thumbs up really does help.

10. Invite Her and Let Her Off When She Comes

When that first night happens she will be pissed after 0.5 glasses of prosecco and it’s highly likely she will sob during a live stream of the baby monitor.

TMC Family Recipe Of The Week: Crunchy Garlic Chicken

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 17 April 2021

TMC Family Recipe Of The Week: Crunchy Garlic Chicken

Can you tell we like chicken yet? As with most of our favourites, this one can be prepped during the day, left in the fridge and popped into the oven at dinner time, but we’d recommend doing the messy bit during nap time – this isn’t a job to do when you’re holding a crying baby.

Ingredients

• 4 tbsp (about 40g) grated parmesan
• 5 tbsp mayonnaise
• large garlic clove, crushed
• 1 lemon, zested
• 2 tsp finely chopped fresh herbs (such as thyme, sage or rosemary) or ½ tsp mixed dried herbs
• 50g panko breadcrumbs
• 2 boneless, skinless chicken breast
• lemon wedges, snipped chives and roasted potatoes and tomatoes to serve (optional)

Method

1. Create a production line of one board, two wide, shallow bowls or dishes, and a baking tray that will comfortably fit the chicken breasts, lined with baking parchment or oiled foil.
2. If intending to bake immediately, heat oven to 200C/180C fan/gas 6. (Otherwise, remember to turn the oven on 10 minutes before baking.)
3. In the first dish, mix the parmesan, mayo, garlic, lemon zest, herbs and seasoning to form a paste – a tablespoon does this well, and helps at the next stage. Tip the crumbs into the second dish and shake so they cover the base.
4. Now the messy part. Put the chicken on the board and, if necessary, trim and discard any flappy bits. Blot well with kitchen paper – this will help the coating stick.
5. Slide the first breast into the mayo mix and use the spoon to make sure it is coated all over. Pick it up by the pointy end and place on the crumbs. Use a spoon to cover completely with crumbs and press them on gently until covered all over. Pick up once again by the ‘tail’ and place on the prepared baking tray. Repeat with the second breast, then discard any leftover mayo and crumbs.
6. Bake for 25-30 mins until golden and cooked through. Transfer to a board and slice into three or four thick slices, scatter over the chives and serve with the lemon wedges, roasted potatoes and tomatoes, if you like.

Travelling With a Newborn Made Easy

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 14 April 2021

Travelling With a Newborn Made Easy

Meet the hotels and products that take the stress and strain away.

The Fish Hotel

Near Broadway, Cotswolds, England

The Fish Hotel can be found on a hillside, in the middle of a 400-acre private estate in the middle of the Cotswolds. With the comfiest Naturalmat mattresses, not only does it ensure a good night’s sleep, it has a fun, quirky and refreshingly modern set up: rather than all being found in one main building, accommodation consists of shepherd’s huts, tree houses and rooms in a series of beautiful Cotswolds stone buildings. The Fish is an ideal place to take a new-born for a relaxed holiday in beautiful surroundings. The staff are incredibly friendly and will happily accommodate your requests for all things baby. Make sure you take an hour or two for a leisurely lunch in The Lounge, and order the tacos from their specialised taco menu – delicious!

Rooms from £150

www.thefishhotel.co.uk

Bedruthan Hotel & Spa

Newquay, Cornwall, England

Set into the clifftop overlooking Mawgan Porth Beach, The Bedruthan Hotel & Spa is a must-stay for families. Management and staff could not be more considerate of families with small children, with a variety of restaurant options, an indoor and outdoor pool, a spa and even an indoor soft play for rainy days. The hotel has been run by the same family for over 60 years, so it maintains a family feel but with the air of a luxury beach side hotel. They can provide all the baby and toddler equipment you need.

Rooms from £129

www.bedruthan.com

Another Place

Ullswater, Lake District, England

Another Place has a dreamy position on the shores of Ullswater in the Lake District. It prides itself on being a relaxed hotel that prizes quality family time, while still offering an incredibly high standard of food, service and accommodation (if you’ve ever been to its sister location, the stunning Watergate Bay Hotel in Cornwall, you’ll recognise a similar vibe). The hotel has a variety of rooms that can easily accommodate a cot, much of the baby equipment you might need, and pantries with microwaves, washing-up facilities and a fridge – so useful! The swimming pool has incredible views of Ullswater, and there’s a glorious which is perfect for a post-partum massage.

Rooms from £270

www.another.place/

Woolley Grange

Bradford-on Avon, Wiltshire, England

A countryside retreat in a 17th Century Jacobean Manor, with an impressive personal touch that keeps families returning year after year. This hotel has thought of everything needed to keep parents relaxed and their children entertained. All necessary equipment is provided, and the staff clearly adore children. To ensure that new parents in particular have a successful first holiday, a ‘Baby’s First Stay Away’ package includes treats such as a baby singing class, baby’s first swimming lesson and a baby massage class. The garden is a highlight, with chickens, rabbits and pigs, scarecrows, a tree swing and even a fairy garden. Truly a hotel worth introducing to your special new addition.

Rooms from £119

www.wooleygrangehotel.co.uk

The Gleneagles Hotel

Auchterarder, Perth and Kinross, Scotland

Luxurious, decadent, opulent… if you want to push the boat out for baby’s first trip then this is the place. There’s so much to explore and enjoy in this iconic hotel, and Gleneagles has thought of everything to make your family stay as comfortable as possible. Baby equipment is easily provided, bespoke baby food can be prepared by the hotel’s top chefs, and experienced babysitters are on hand if needed. When your baby is older, the hotel has thoughtfully-designed children’s spaces for them to enjoy – they can even try their hand at outdoor pursuits such as archery, off-roading in a mini Land Rover replica, or they even ‘own a pony’ for the day. Just hope they don’t get too much of a taste for it…

Rooms from £295

www.gleneagles.com

The Products to Help You Get a Better Night’s Sleep

Upgrade your travel cot with a much comfier mattress. Black out the morning light. And pack a sleep inducing sound machine… *Then cross everything!

Travelmat – Travel Cot Mattress

Naturalmat Baby

£90

Sleeptight Portable Blackout Blind

Tommee Tippee

£27.99 (Sale)

Portable White Noise Sound Machine

Yogasleep Hushh

£34.95 (Sale)

Tags 10minuteread, Bedtimebrowse, newDesign

How long will it take for my tummy to shrink after birth?

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 13 April 2021

How long will it take for my tummy to shrink after birth?

Being a living breathing vessel is bloody hard. At nine months you just want to scream, “I’m done with this sharing malarkey, just give me my body back!

Then your wish comes true. And while it’s great – mainly because no one is internally kicking you anymore. This new you is not old you, and quite frankly, it feels a bit shit.

But it doesn’t last forever.

Messages online will say it takes months or years for your stomach to return. Others will declare that it won’t ever be the same. Oh, and of course, you’ll see images of women who don’t even look like they’ve had a baby.

A few will make you feel better. Most will make you feel worse.
So, want to hear the truth? Not one person is the same. All our tummies, pregnancies and births differ. Your stomach before baby, in pregnancy, and after, will be different to every mother you know. There are so many variables, and there’s NO WAY you can compare both your bump and your body’s recovery to someone else’s.

Now for some good news…

“The majority of women can get their tummy back with a sufficient level of guidance”, says Specialist Pelvic Health Physiotherapist Emma Brockwell.

A message we can all get on board with. Read on to find out how.

How will my tummy look after birth?

“Hold on? I still look pregnant”, said every new Mum in the history of motherhood.

It’s a shocker for sure, but it’s completely normal explains Emma Brockwell, “Your stomach has taken a long time to stretch to that shape, but it will go back”.

Mentally that’s hard, so don’t worry if it makes you upset because you won’t feel like this forever. In the meantime, wear lots of loose flowing tops and dresses and read on to find out what else you can do.

How long will it take for my tummy to shrink?

You’ve lived the last nine months reading how your body might change every week, so it’s understandable that you’d like some guidance on how things might go post-birth.

Fiit Mum trainer Charlie Launders, explains “Frustratingly, it is difficult to give an exact time or estimate because we are all so different. The time it takes for you tummy to return to its pre-pregnancy size will depend on your genetics, the size of your bump, the type of birth you had, and the amount of weight gained in pregnancy”.

Also, let’s be honest, it would be pretty weird if your tummy did just snap back, “In the weeks and months following birth all of the organs that were squished and moved to make way for your baby need to return to their usual places. Your core muscles will be recovering without you even realising it, as well as your pelvic floor, so try not to put too much pressure on yourself “says, Charlie Launders.

How can I make my tummy flat after birth?

Yes, yes, we hear you cry. But when? “Expect it to take longer than 6-weeks, which is usually what women expect”, says Emma Brockwell. She adds, “Even if you haven’t had a c-section, that abdominal wall will take a good couple of months to strengthen” But that doesn’t mean it won’t gradually go down, because it will.

Does having a c-section mean your tummy takes longer to shrink?

If you didn’t plan to have a c-section, then it can be quite shocking. The recovery process can take some time, and it’s upsetting when your stomach doesn’t seem to be going down.

Want to shout, ‘Fuck off!’, at anyone that says, “You should be proud of your body, it grew your baby!”. Yeah, we don’t blame you. We love our babies, but we’d also quite like to feel like us again.

Think of it this way, you have had abdominal surgery, and yes, it will take a little longer for the tummy to strengthen and shrink, but at least your vagina is still intact. Small wins people.

What is diastasis recti?

Irrespective of delivery, any woman can experience diastasis recti. Even though it sounds very technical, it is very common (about 60% of women have it) and it is a term used for when the muscles in your stomach separate in order to make space for your growing baby.

Tummy exercises you can do after birth

Straight from the get-go, “The first thing you can do to start flattening your stomach is your pelvic floor exercises. Your pelvic floor connects to your core, which is what helps flatten the whole abdominal wall”, says Emma.

When can you do actual exercise after birth?

We sound like a broken record, but it really does differ from person to person. As Emma explains, “Slow progressive abdominal exercises are best advised on an individual basis by either a pelvic health physiotherapist or trained postnatal fitness instructor”.

How much is a postnatal MOT?

Feeling a bit broken? We’re not surprised, you’ve just carried a baby inside you and don’t even get us started on labour.

Check-in with a professional and give your body the care and repair it deserves. Dependant on where you live, a postnatal MOT costs around £80. This will usually consist of an external and internal examination, where they will check the strength of your pelvic floor, your core and see if you have any muscle separation. Then they will advise you on recovery methods and exercises.

Feel like it’s a splurge? Just think about all the baby crap you’ve bought. You deserve this, so don’t feel guilty about having it.

Will my tummy always be different?

No actually, “Some women’s tummies aren’t that affected by having a baby, it depends on your connective tissue, how you carry your baby during pregnancy, how you’ve delivered and your genetic makeup. For the majority of women, they can get their tummy back with a really good level of guidance”, says Emma.

Tags newDesign

How To Refresh Your Underwear Drawer Pre, During & After The Birth

Post author By The Mum Club
Post date 13 April 2021

How To Refresh Your Underwear Drawer Pre, During & After The Birth

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